When creating a budget, sooner is better than later. Meaning: it should be one of the first five things you do after you are engaged. Setting expectations early on will help avoid confusion, heart ache and lots of drama. If your parents are going to be involved, I like to suggest that each person – the bride and the groom – meet separately with their parents to discuss this sensitive subject. Then, the two of you can regroup and go from there. But remember, those who contribute financially to the wedding usually expect to have a say in the wedding plans. So don’t forget to also discuss roles and involvement in decision-making when the budget is discussed. Get it out in the open early on! After hearing the expectations of involvement from your relatives, you may decide it is best to pay for it on your own!
As far as who pays for what, there are a lot of traditional “rules” that you can follow…but the modern bride and groom can also feel comfortable making their own rules. Budget etiquette is quite flexible and there are several combinations of who is paying for what which are completely acceptable. If you’d like something to go on, a contemporary option is the “FLOP” method. Using this rule of thumb, the groom’s family pays for flowers, liquor, orchestra (music) and photography. In addition, the groom’s family also pays for the rehearsal dinner. The bride’s family would then pay for everything else.
Whatever you decide, decide early, stick to the plan, and don’t let money issues ruin your day. No matter what the budget or who is paying – you’ll still end up marrying the person of your dreams!
Happy Planning!!
